Helpline for Harassed Men!!

Misguided Laws

2005-04-26T12:05:00.000-07:00

A large number of women than men suffer from various attrocities commited against them in family situations.

But, these attrocities have not reduced due to badly implemented laws in a utterly dysfunctional legal system in India ? I guess, you must be aware what goes on in police stations and how long it takes to get out a civil case (forget a criminal case).

The cruelty law 498a has been a miserable failure so far as protecting women in India is concerned. But Feminists will lie as usual. In west, laws work. Unfortunately, entire Human Rights Campaign works only if there is a proper judicial system. The Human Rights campaigns go no where when the legal system is dysfunction (as in India).

I just want to ask: Does the laws of perjury work in India ? Does the laws of contempt of court work ? The entire legal system is highly insenstive and overloaded. So, Human Rights which are solely based on legal stuff, go no where as the judiciary fails to execute. So, the entire movement ends up with a few conferences, articles and some activism. Nothing more.

In a country where you can get an arrest warrent against President (of the Country) issues by paying a bribe, has Human Rights via Legal system got any significance ? We copy what Human Rights activists do in west and try to paste it in India without understanding that the legal system in dysfunctional here.

So, we doubt the competency of the law makers. There is a bill in Rajya Sabha which will make the law Section 498a(cruelty & harassment to woman) compoundable based on the large scale data on its misuse. The law 498a was enacted by a bunch of fools who just got carried away by the campaign by Feminists to give more teeths to law due to increasing deaths of women in their matrimonial home. Little did anybody realise that this law is stringent but badly directed.

Western reductionism does not work in social contexts. The problems in society can not be isolated as women's problem, children's problem, elder's problems, problems of physically challenged and finally men's problems. All problems are interrelated. When we show overenthusiam in one side, there will be an imbalance in other side. Today, Feminists are feeling proud about large scale divorce rate in Bangalore. But, has single parenting helped the American society ? You must be aware that the children out of broken families have a much greater chance of being violent, intolerant and abusive. So, its all comes back like Karma and will again increase voilence against women after 20 years. We are yet to see a High School Shootings in India.

When we want to bring social change, we must have an alternate structure available. Feminism is hitting the very foundation of family in India and still we do not have proper counselling mechanism in place. Ultimately, children who have no voice will suffer.

Btw, I always wondered "Does Feminism has even a single thing positive to say about Men ?"

Moreover "Does men had a better time than women in total in the entire history of humankind ?" Even though, I strongly agree than men controlled the power structure. Have you ever thought of how many men may be dying arranging dowry for their daughters ? Men die directly by committing suicide or indirectly by other health problems in middle age while trying to arrange finances for the family. At least, half of these deaths are related to marriage of daughters. Most of these suicides by men are categoriesed under financial reasons. But, society is trained to take hardship of men for granted.

The concept of victimilogy applied to women in Media and by NGO has its repercussions in society. The more women and girls are picturised as victims, the more people will perceive girls as burdens. The consequences are quite well known to all of us. How many people know that 50% more men commit suicide than women ? Last year, 68000 men committed suicide compared to 40000 women in India. Thats, 28000 more suicides by men compared to women and per day it comes to 76 men more than women.

The life expectency rate of men is 2.4 years less than women in India. But it will reach to 6 to 7 years (as in west) in another decade. When people realise that men's life is as difficult as women's, the preference for girl child will increase. If, woman is always picturised as a victim then that scares parents and considering girl as a burden people indulge in foeticide.

The links in following page should be enough to convince anybody are there is a massive scam that going on. The real victims do not get to register cases in police station itself where as the legal system holds on to bogus ones wasting court time and tax payer's money(so, conviction rate has become 2%). Most of the Human Rights activists relax after a law is implemented only to find after a decade that the attrocities against women have increased. Then, they cry for more stringent laws. When Justice Malimath (Former chairman of National Human Rights Commission and former chief justice of karnataka high court) gave a report on large scale misuse of section 498a, Feminists cried foul that he is Gender Insensitive.

http://www.saveindianfamily.com/pages/misuse.html

We see and attend large scale extravagant weddings in Bangalore. Does not this also sends a wrong signal to society ? Does section 498a have anything for this ? N0.

There are numerous women who mail to us seeking help for themselves and their brothers who are in bogus cases. The president and vice president of our organisations are women. This law 498a is not gender specific. Filing a section 498a case in police station is like ordering an Idli Sambar. Police will immediately arrest old in-laws, married/unmarried/preganant sisters (without investigation) and the man. There is no punishment even fine for filing a false case.

Get Free Counselling if suffering from False Dowry Cases

2005-04-06T08:52:00.000-07:00

CLICK Here to get Free Advice and Counselling if suffering from false 498a case

How to Improve Gender Sensitivity in India

1) Women must not be imprisoned even if they kill. They need to be put in reformation homes.

2) As soon as a woman marries, she must get 50% rights onto husband's property.

3) Large scale single parenting by woman with maintenance provided by husband. Research shows that children who are not allowed to see their fathers after divorce for years grow up very healthy. In India, Gender Sensitive judges must allow the women to decide whether she allows the father to see teh child after divorce or not.

4) Any violence committed by woman against other(including murder) be considered as done in self-defense.

5) The disparity between life expectency rate difference between men and women need to be brought to the levels at developed countries. In India, women live 2.4 years more than men on an average. This difference in life expectency has to be brought to the levels in US and Europe where women live more than 6 years than men on an average.

6) If a man cancels the enagagement, he need to be punished with imprison up to 5 months. If a woman cancels engagement, she must be compensated with 30% of man's yearly income.

7) Any woman who commits suicide within 7 years of marriage, a dowry harassment or other harassment case against the husband to be put by default. He must be imprisoned for 1 year for not taking care of his wife.

8) If a woman complains of domestic violence, the man must be imprisoned immediately and bail can only be granted by a court. All the joint bank accounts must be frozen. Woman has to right to stay in the matrimonial home(husband's house), till she gets divorce. If the women has an adulterous relation, till it is proved (beyond doubt) the husband must allow her to live in his house or must provide alternate accommodation. The typical example for benchmark is the case in movie "Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam". Husband is also expected to help the women achieve her adulterous goals. If he can not directly help, he must provide one third of his salary towards the wife till she marries the other man.

9) A man must do half of household work even if his wife is not working.

10) After marriage, a man must not stay with his parents or allow his parents to stay prolonged period with him. He must allow his in-laws to stay in his house for the same amount of time his parents stay in his house. If he violates these rights of the woman, he can be imprisoned for not taking equal care of his in-laws.

11) If in-laws of a man "feel" their daughter and they are not properly treated, the man should be thoroughly counselled. If he does not mend his ways, stringent laws be made (even provision for lashing) for rectifying him.

12) The ratio of male:female suicide rates in India to be brought to the levels in west. In India, 50%(about 25000) more men commit suicide than women. This is much lower than the western standards where about 150% more men commit suicide than women.

13) The richer and the more educated the men are, the more should be pressure on them. They should provide the wife with a lifestyle equivalent to their status and they must also spend quality time with family.

14) In case of techies in Bangalore, they are expected to be even more soft as they work in software industry and earn a lot. They must deposit 20% of their monthly salary in their wife's name.

15) If wife of a techie complains of dowry harassment or any other harassment, he must be sacked from the job after he gets out of the jail getting bail.

16) If the wife and husband both are techies, then the wife must not spend any amount of her salary towards the household or her personal expenses. All the expenses must be born by the man.

17) Streedhan given as gift to daughter during marriage must also be considered as dowry.

18) Women in rural india and poor women suffer due to ignorance and they can not afford legal help. So, the legal provisions must be used only in urban india. The rural women must be discouraged from approaching police or courts as they can not afford to pay bribes. The rural women (women in villages) must be empowered with better employment and they must be counselled to live healthy life in traditional family system and respect the decisions of family elders. This way, it can be shown that laws on women's rights are UNDERUSED. That will help the urban women to MISUSE the law and file false cases. That will give good business to Feminist lawyers and Human Rights lawyers and provide good bribes to the police. Of course, the booty is ultimately settled between police and Women organisations. The extortion for a Techie goes upto 1 lac and for NRI it goes upto 4 lacs.
19) The rural women do not suffer from domestic violence. Hence domestic violence laws must be used more stringently in urban india only.

20) Recent study shows startling details that more women than men died on Titanic in 1911.

21) Men had much better life than women since ages. Men fought wars and always had good food in plundered lands when their women remained in hunger.

22) 25% of software engineers are women, so does 50% of medical students. The men whom these women marry must get bigger salaries than these women and must have higher social status than these talented women. Women must always marry up.

23) Men who do not like their wives wearing revealing clothes(including low-jeans) are old fashioned. In stead of divorcing them, their wives must use threat of section 498a (anti-dowry laws) to get the old parents of the man imprisioned, so that men can be counselled to change and learn tolerance.

24) Designers who plan to design revealing clothes for men must be banned for spreading vulgarity. Wearing revealing clothes is a right solely meant for women.

25) All judges who do not follow gender sensitivity and give judgements against women, must lose their right to pension.

26) Crime Against Women (CAW) cells must counsel the men such that men realise that if they do not bend, then their parents, even grandparents be imprisoned and tortured. CAW cells must also counsel the men not to commit suicide by telling them in details various methods of committing suicide. Men committing suicide must always be listed as suicide due to financial reason even if he commits suicide arranging dowry for his daughter.

27) As prevalent in Govt. services, any man accused of harassment against his wife, must be fired from job. Special camps must be set up by govt. in each state for these men to reform. Only hard work can make them learn patience and considerate behaviour. "Work Brings Freedom", "Arbeit Macht Frei". Their property must be confiscated by the state and donated to the NGOs working hand-in-hand with sincere police and benovelant lawyers for betterment of women.

28) Many human rights organisations have created examples of gender sensitivity by championing against giving bail to old and sick in-laws of women who complain of mistreatment. In fact, to iradicate dowry evil in India, these old and sick people must be imprisoned without investigation so that their sons can learn lessons for not caring the sincere and wise advice of their wives and in-laws. Even "Amnesty International" has opposed bail to sick and infirm in-laws of a woman as suggested by a gender insensitive former high court judge. 25000 women dying of dowry is a much bigger problem than only 10000 parents of men falsely getting jailed. Only a handful of old in-laws of the woman have committed suicide due to false dowry cases than the number of women dying in dowry problem. (All references and data are provided below)

29) Human rights orgnisations have gone a long way fighting against POTA and TADA. Because even terrorists have the right to international law. Dowry evil is much bigger than terrorism. The number of women getting killed by dowry is much more than the number of people killed by terrorists. So, Human Rights Organisations must campaign for continuation of present laws where the old parents of NRIs and Techies are jailed with just one line of complaint from their daughter-in-law. Even if the complaint is false, arrest of old parents of the man sends a clear message to the society which oppressed women since ages.

30) Recenly, many human rights activists protested against the judge who gave a order criticising imprisonment of 3-year old girl child who spent 3 days in Tihar jail with her whole family (facing dowry harassment charges). This kind of organisations need generous donations by the people who want to change the world.
31) The fight for women's rights will never end. So, lets campaign for the people in this world to donate for this great cause. After all, woman's development is human's development.
32) Many NGOs in India and abroad have collected millions of dollars for causes of women. Because woman's development is human's development and women's rights are human rights. Because of their dedicated actions in bringing in funds has helped in arresting so many sick and old people in false dowry harassment cases in urban india. Many of these old in-laws of women have committed suicide out of shame when their daughter-in-law got a bargaining position by filing false dowry cases against them. Because of these generous funds donated by many benovalent people in US, these people can commit suicide. Otherwise, these old people are just a social nuisance. What can be a greater social service than to iradicate social nuisance and create social justice.
33) Recenly, an old couple were arrested in Kerala and transported like animals to Delhi on train to face charges of dowry harassment. Even though they never stayed with their daughter-in-law, but it gives a clear signal to the society that its time the dowry be iradicated.

Please donate freely to all the NGOs and human rights organisaions generously. Research shows that when more and more women live as single parents, that children become healthy. Children of single mothers in US have become great scientists, researchers and social reformers. The same needs to be emulated in India so that India can develop.

34) Many NRIs have donated generously for the foreign visits of women's rights activists. These activists are responsible for bringing patriarchy in India to its knees by championing in favour of detention of all people including old and minors against whom a woman complains of dowry harassment. Of course, it does not matter even if the in-laws never even stayed with the woman and the case she filed is false. What is important is the social deterant it creates. India Today reports 55% of divorce cases filed last year has women as primary petitioners. This must increase to 75% in next few years. The more the divorces and single parenting in india, the earlier we will achieve gender equality.

35) Recently ZeeNews Andha Kanoon has aired a program on how indian legal system lacks gender sensitivity. You can listen to the mp3 listed below in reference section. Just because of the generous donations to the NGOs that India has developed so much that the guilty go scot- free and non-guilty are imprisoned.
People who run NGOs and donate to NGOs in US are as truthful as their own President and propaganda based media. Their perceptions are also as accurate as perceptions of an average American. They also want to change and improve the world just the way US is improving the world. God will certainly give them and their children long happy life. After all, changing the world by funding extremist feminists which leads to arrests "without investigation" of old and infirm is indeed a noble act. Finally, Karma will give us what we give to others. As sick and old who can not walk properly make rounds in court, God will bless us all for standing for fighting against patriarchy and conducting garrulous arguments with rigid mindsets brainwashed by media in stead of seeing the subtleties in social issues. Since ages, we know reductionism (cutting, solving and pasting ) solved all great problems !!

References:-----------------
http://www.tribuneindia.com/2005/20050403/punjab1.htm#8(Dowry cases to come under community policing plan)

http://www.indiatogether.org/2004/mar/law-sect498a.htm

http://www.countercurrents.org/gender-hrf171103.htm

http://www.geocities.com/gorky_maksim/

http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/cms.dll/html/uncomp/articleshow?msid=52328

http://rapidshare.de/files/913110/andhakanoon2.mp3.html

http://www.saveindianfamily.com/

http://www.dayahouston.org/agnes.htm

(With a small effort one can see who works for rights and who works for revenge.)

Misguided Laws

2004-12-26T12:05:00.000-08:00

Helpline for Harassed Men in Bangalore!!

2004-10-23T11:22:00.000-07:00

Since last one year, there is a Helpline (91-80-56969850) in Bangalore for distressed men and their family members. It receives about 20 calls in a week from the men who are distressed due to harassment by the wife or her parents. The callers include many techies working in reputed firms and NRIs(Nonresident Indians/Indians living outside india). As soon as someone calls the helpline, his complaint is heard and he is called for a face-to-face discussion during which a lawyer and a counsellor are present.
Visit: http://www.geocities.com/gorky_maksim/

The NGO(non-Government Organisation) called Sangyabalya and the helpline were launched by H V Arun Murthy, a freelance writer originally from Bangalore, who was living happily in Delhi until he was summoned by a court as an accused in a dowry case filed by his sister-in-law. Murthy says his brother married a girl from an orphanage. The marriage went bad very fast and has now ended in a dowry harassment complaint that put Murthy, his brother, and some other family members in jail for a short period.
"Who could have paid dowry for that girl? The orphanage authorities?" demands an angry, white-haired, single Murthy.
"The courts are always sympathetic to women," he told rediff.com "Even our laws do not recognise the possibility of wives and daughters-in-laws ill-treating husbands and old in-laws. I know of so many cases where section 498-A [of the Indian Penal Code] has just been used as an instrument of blackmail. But public sympathy is all for the perpetrators of the crime. More than 90 per cent of dowry cases filed are dismissed. But no punitive action is taken against the women who file the cases, even though it is sometimes proved that they lied under oath."
Under the Indian Penal Code of 498a, the police only require one line in writing from a woman, that her husband/his parents/his brothers/sisters are harassing her physically or mentally with demands of dowry. It is as easy as ordering a Pizza. The Police are bound to act by arresting all the accused (including mothers, unmarried sisters) with immediate effect without investigation, send them to Judicial Custody (prison) . This has led to a growing trend of women and her dominant parents harassing the husband and her family and then threatening them of the false complaints in case they resist. So the poor guy and his family tolerate fearing the worst. As this continues, the demands start increasing finally leading to situation when the battered husband and his family could no longer tolerate and they stand up. Then the woman goes for the final kill by filing the case. The imprisoned husband and his family can’t get bail for at least 2 days. If the girl’s family has good connections in corrupt indiansystem then the stay in prison can continue for even a month. Often, huge amounts of money is demanded from the guy and his parents for out of court settlements. Many Techies and NRIs in a state of continuous, iterative victimization and defamation, simply comply.
Sangyabalya can be contacted at 91-80-56969850. Their email address is http://mail.yahoo.com/config/login?/ym/Compose?To=victimsof498a@rediffmail.com.
Visit http://www.sangaybalya.org/
For more details visit the following link and also view the full message board. http://www.rediff.com/news/2003/dec/24spec.htm
Other articles:
www.deccanherald.com/deccanherald/jun16/c3.asp http://www.hallabol.com/portal/article4.html
http://news.indiainfo.com/publicopinion/dowry.html
http://www.umiacs.umd.edu/users/sawweb/sawnet/news/news408.txt

To seek help reach to:
there is also yagoogroup: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/misusedowryact/
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http://www.geocities.com/CapitolHill/6708/sowryhar.html